Sheer Pleasure

As I spend precious time with my family, I have received such lovely gifts.  Packages have arrived from coast to coast, each containing unique items such as ‘hardware’ from New York (see below), tasty baked goods and farmer’s market selections from Minneapolis, artisan chocolates from San Francisco, and favorite wines from everywhere.  

The only drawback is the time spent indulging in these items has distracted me from posting to the blog.

My apologies.

“Enjoying” the gifts faster might save time, but would pose a challenge to the fine balance of alcohol consumption vs. seizure threshold.  But don’t feel sorry for me, as I am up to task of mastering this balancing act.  Plus the wine shop closest to our home is enjoying a surge in sales, and given the current economy we would hate to spoil this for them.

I am thrilled to report an amazing upswing on the symptom roller coaster.  Quite frankly, while the recent free fall was scary it provided a needed refocus: SEIZE NOT JUST EACH DAY ACTIVELY  - BUT EACH IDEA.   I was beginning to hesitate if an idea seemed a little too excessive in combination or I had more than one per day.  Hello - is there a one per customer per day limit?

And there is a silver lining in the timing of this entire process.   Everyone knows what a massive role my yard and gardens play in my life. So how lucky am I that we are currently in the full growth season of late spring rather than the winter here in Michigan?

Something new comes into bloom in my garden each week.  I indicate which current showpiece should be clipped and I then revel in creating a flower arrangement in a vase.  Now all the family here can benefit from my labor of love.

Because there are too many flowers for just my household - all gardeners are guilty of this - I would take arrangements to work. In 2011, I was pleased to be able to cover the commercial loan operation department of about twelve to fifteen gals despite the tumor madness.

Here is a sample of the latest bloom. 

An-ti-ci-pa-a-a-a-a-a-tion

All right people, I am shocked that I haven’t been inundated with stories. I thought for sure I would have to hire 3 book editors to sort through them all!  Hmm…maybe I’m not that funny... maybe I’m not that nice…maybe nobody likes me. All kidding aside, I will enjoy any and all threads of the great memories we have shared together. Don’t feel pressure to be ‘funny’. If it makes you smile or chuckle, send it in!

I am going to get things started by sharing a selection of tales that are quintessentially 'me.'

Story #1: 38 years ago, I was trying to get my future husband to notice me, but he wouldn’t get his head out of his car. This blew my mind.  Fast forward, I eventually got Keith to be aware of my presence and ask me out on a date. One night, we were driving around drinking beer and I realized I was going to 'hoolio.'  Regrettably, he couldn’t stop the car fast enough. I left an indelible impression on the interior, especially the doors that were lined with shaggy, fake fur. Eventually, I made it up to him by having that car restored. The doors are now lined with leather (not that I require an easily cleanable fabric these days).

Now it’s your turn…don’t make me beg

• funnypeggystories@gmail.com
• peggystudz@gmail.com

F*ck! F@ck! F&ck!

I was absolutely convinced that I could out muscle and out stubborn melanoma. Shockingly, I might actually be incorrect.

On Friday, Keith and I saw Dr. Flaherty and Dr. Mittal where I learned the one-two punch of my fourth gamma knife followed by 10 days of whole brain radiation has not produced the knockout victory we had hoped for. A cyst has grown around tumor #7. Additionally, there is new cancer growth around the cyst; the tumor/cyst combination now measures 5cm. This has resulted in extensive cerebral edema (swelling) creating substantial pressure in my brain. I am experiencing unpleasant physical symptoms making it tough for me to do what I want to do. On the positive side, it has given me free reign to drink wine again…with no objection provided by anyone! A third craniotomy was presented as a final option, but I have decided to pass.

Why spend my last weeks in recovery when I could be doing what I have always encouraged people to do, burn the candle not only at both ends, but in the middle. I am pretty sure Keith and Melissa will continue to say, “Your wish is my command,” so here’s my plan:

• spending time with family and friends
• laughing
• reminiscing
• smelling the flowers at the Eastern Market
• savoring excellent wine
• indulging in weekend treat food every dang day
• no holds barred!

I just want to express how much we appreciate the tremendous amount of support we have received from all our family and friends over the last 9 months. My posse continues to grow everyday, with two-week old Katelyn Nagy as the newest member. Here is a depiction of her feelings on melanoma. (Note: I only held her for 10 minutes when she was a week old, but we obviously made an instant connection.)

I know you’re sitting there thinking…”What can I do?” Here’s what I propose – send us your favorite Peggy stories – funny ones to (funnypeggystories@gmail.com) and any other sentiments you would like to express to peggystudz@gmail.com.

I feel like I ruled the world; it’s time for you to rule yours. Stop planning and start executing.

-Peggy

Whole Brain Train

Two, Four, Six, Eight!
Did NOT
Want To

Whole Brain

Radiate

But… it is the best approach.

I had another MRI on Monday (April 30th).  This was to obtain a current snapshot of the tumors that were to be treated with Gamma Knife that day.  The physicist uses the snapshot to program the machine to hit the target areas.

When I go for a Gamma Knife treatment it is typical that I only see Dr. Lee (the surgeon who attaches the frame) and Dr. Kim (radiological oncologist) who directs the process.   But, if Dr. Mittal (brain surgeon) is called in….then I know there is a problem.

So when Dr. Mittal again wanted to ‘show me’ something I immediately let him know I was not interested in hearing there was an 8th tumor.  He quickly assured me there was not another tumor.  But, as I walked down the hallway I realized that this did not necessarily mean there was not a problem.   This time Dr. Mittal was there to tell me the larger of the two newest tumors that were to be treated that morning had tripled in size from 1cm to 3cm in just 17 days.   

So, I had a choice to make.    

1. Proceed with Gamma Knife only.

• Pro:  Able to reach the smaller tumor that is so deep in my brain it cannot be treated via craniotomy.  Though smaller, this tumor is in a critical area of the brain.
• Con: Does not address the potential for multiple new tumors.

2. Have a 3rd craniotomy to remove the larger tumor, then Gamma Knife to the smaller tumor and the bed of the larger tumor.

• Pro:  Craniotomy is a clean scoop of the larger tumor, surrounding blood vessels remain viable which speeds healing and recovery.
• Con:  Usual surgical risks.  The smaller tumor (which is not reachable via surgery) could grow during the required post op recovery period and next Gamma Knife.

3. Proceed with Gamma Knife on both new tumors, then immediately start whole brain radiation.

• Pro: Gamma Knife now will immediately address the smaller tumor.  Gamma Knife may limit further growth of the larger tumor.  Whole brain radiation limits the potential for multiple new tumors (7 is enough!)
• Con:  Whole brain radiation can only be done once.  It affects brain functions, but it’s not possible to predict which brain functions could be involved. Depending on the outcome, a future craniotomy may still be necessary to relieve the pressure in my brain.

I chose #3.    While none of the choices are perfect, it is the most aggressive approach.  It also was helpful that for the first time since the April 30th MRI, each of the doctors agreed with my choice.

So, I had Gamma Knife on both new tumors on Monday, followed by four whole brain radiation treatments Tuesday through Friday.  There are six more treatments ahead of me.  

Keith and I will be heading down to Karmanos every afternoon this week.  I usually am home in time for a nap before dinner.   My appetite remains legendary – Piggy Peggy still reigns!