Chapter 6

Out of Surgery 

Around 6:30 PM, without the pager going off, Keith looks up to see Dr. Olson heading towards them.  He was beaming and told Keith & Melissa “I got it all”.  The membrane of the cyst was firmer than he had anticipated, enabling him to resect the entire mass.  (Frequently the membrane is more like wet toilet paper and doesn't remain in one piece.)  Dr. Olson also advises them that the pathologist’s gut reaction to the tumor was that it was melanoma.

Keith & Melissa are in complete shock.  Neither of them had thought about melanoma for several years as it had been 17 years since my initial diagnosis.  Patients with a stage one skin cancer like my original melanoma (the spot on my hip was less than 1/4" in diameter) which is caught early have a 99% survival rate.  After ten years, the chance of a re-occurrence are considered to be less than 1%.  Obviously we would need to wait for the final biopsy results before any decisions are made regarding treatment but the fact that the malignancy is due to melanoma is significant.

When we meet Dr. Flaherty (the oncologist we chose to treat me) approximately two weeks later, he would liken this turn of events to a "terrorist attack" - unexpected and frightening but at least now we are aware of it's presence.  Now we have our eyes wide open and can monitor me for trouble going forward.

Around 8:45 PM, after approximately two hours in recovery, I am brought back to my room sound asleep with a large bandage around my head.  According to Keith & Melissa, I opened my eyes once or twice for a few seconds but drift immediately back to sleep with out speaking.  The nurses reassure Keith & Melissa that it is highly unlikely that I will wake up and finally convince them to go home to get some rest.  It will be needed for the next day.

Saturday was a long day for all of us.

I discovered after the fact Keith and Melissa had different concerns that never entered my mind.  I honestly never considered that I would come out of the surgery with any complications.  I expected it to be painful but without any permanent effect on me.  I was surprised to hear they felt differently.

I was asleep/unconscious when they left on Friday night  Here are some of their questions related to my waking up:  How would I be when I woke up?  What if my speech was slurred? What if I couldn’t talk? What if I couldn’t move? What if I was “different”?  I regret they were so worried but I have to say I am glad they never expressed what was on their minds to me.

When I come to full consciousness on Saturday, I recognize that my "headache" is finally gone from the left side of my head.  However, it has been replaced with extensive pain on the right side.  Frankly, it felt like someone smashed a sledge hammer in my head.

When I start speaking, I keep asking over and over, “Is it Sunday yet?” Remember, I am 100% focused on the fact that the pain will improve on Sunday, so I incessantly make the same inquiry.  I am sure it was puzzling to Keith and Melissa.  What is the meaning of Sunday?  Do I think I am going to church?  What is the deal?

I also ask if it is raining.  Keith and Melissa wonder if I have bionic hearing (as it was raining outside that day), BUT we later learn that it was my brain producing spinal fluid to fill in the gap left by the removal of the cyst and tumor.

I desperately need a distraction and I decided to pray (useful tool that helps me relax when I can't sleep). This time it is not relaxing because I am having difficulty keeping track of where I am.  I ask for a rosary thinking maybe they can find one somewhere.  Amazingly, Keith's cousin Debbie who I have been friends with for years (she grew up down the street from me) has left a special rosary from Poland for me on impulse.  As doubtful as Melissa was that it would be utilized when Debbie gave it to her, she is pleased to tell me that "Yes, actually, Aunt Debbie left this one for you."

Keith and Melissa launch into a string of Hail Mary’s. As they count the decades (sometimes arguing which number they were on), I realize they are “doing it wrong” because they skipped the Apostles Creed and Our Father (they left the ‘tail’ with the cross to the end instead of doing that at the beginning). While it was hard for them to decipher my speech, eventually, my daughter is smart enough to Google the rosary. I finally fall asleep with Keith & Melissa each holding one of my hands before we finish the rosary.